Au$tin's Top 40: Rihanna Singles [#2 & #1]

[Au$tin]

Rihanna, Riri, Robyn, Rihsus, whatever you want to call her, has released a total of 40 singles (including features), and being a big Rihanna fan, I think I've heard all of them enough times to give them a ranking.

So stick around because the fun is about to begin!

[josh]

Copycat! :'(

jk ofc. Should be fun! Please not WFL #1 though. Or even top 39. Well she has plenty worse songs so... Not top 10 at least.

[Deleted]

^I mean, he/you/slizzard are the anti-WFL group, so that's pretty much expected that it won't rank highly for him.

[josh]

I just assume everyone loves WFL at this point.

Good to know though.

[Au$tin]

OMG! Early comments! Yay!

#40 - Birthday Cake (Remix) (feat. Chris Brown)[/size]


We start off the countdown with the sultry and psycologically harmful urban hit. Upon hearing the barely one minute interlude on the Talk That Talk album, I wasn't initially impressed. The song felt a bit forced, as if she were trying to be as sexy as possible, but instead gave us something just downright dirty and disgusting. Rihanna is sexy when she isn't trying hard. (See Loud's "Skin")

A few months after "You Da One" flopped and "Talk That Talk" was released, plans to release the interlude in full were announced. Then came the announcement that it would have a shocking feature! Pulse went insane! Who was it going to be? Beyoncé? Britney? Gaga? Nope. Not a female. Drake? Bieber? (Yes, people actually thought that). No, wait, could it be Chris Brown? She wouldn't do that, would she? It sure would be shocking.

Yes. It was Chris Brown.

It probably wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for those lyrics. I mean, seriously? They talk about getting down and dirty with each other, when it was just a few years ago he beat her horribly! WHAT?! Shame on you, Rihanna. I still blame this horrid remix for "Talk That Talk"'s demise. It even hurt Rihanna on my personal chart! "Talk That Talk" was at #7 on my PC when this thing came out. I was so ticked at Rihanna, I stopped playing her music for awhile, making "You Da One" crash off of my chart, and "Talk That Talk" never did make it back into my top 10, even after I got over it.

I have no doubt that if this were just the interlude, or even featured someone else, it would rank much higher in my top 40, but I just can't get past that Chris Brown feature. Ugh!

Coming up: Rihanna is very forgetful as she's told to roll around in an Asian country!

[Lozzy]

I hated "Birthday Cake" at first, but I grew not to mind it. I wouldn't rank it all that highly if I was doing this same countdown, but it definitely isn't her worst single. I still find it ridiculous that they didn't release the remix to iTunes; the interlude is so pointless. I wish they'd have just included a full version on the album in the first place (whether solo or not). I would have preferred it if "Birthday Cake" had been released at a different time to give "Talk That Talk" a chance though, but seeing how poorly "Talk That Talk" did, I'm not sure if the lack of cake would have been enough to make it succeed in general anyway, so I'm not really mad about that. I never really cared for the whole "oh my god she's singing about fucking the man who beat the shit out of her she has no class she has lost her mind she will flop the world will boycott her send her on the next ship back to barbados to rehab!!!!!!111" etc. thing either.

[cesarams]

The next will be Princess Of China?

[josh]

I luv B'Day Cake :'(

[Au$tin]

#39 - What's My Name? (feat. Drake)[/size]


Continuing on, we get to one of Rihanna's #1 smash hits. This is highly regarded as one of Rihanna's best songs by many of her fans, but I just don't like it. It's alright, but it gets annoying very quickly. I've never been a fan of "reggae Rihanna," so the fact that I don't like this isn't that shocking. I find Drake's rap to be annoying as hell and the instrumentation just as bad. Not to mention Rihanna annoyingly whines about amnesia! You name is Robyn Fenty, now shut the hell up!

So of course it always annoyed me that this went to #1 in its first week, and even crossed over onto pop like "Single Ladies." Blech. Oh well. At least it seems to have died out. It hasn't done very well in recurrency thank God.

Coming up: Rihanna is told to roll around in the far east, where she finds love.

[Lozzy]

I love "What's My Name?"! I mean, it's not my favorite of hers, but it's an amazing track – certainly not her second worst single. I love Drake's rap, the overall production, the hook, everything. I was really disappointed when it missed #1; I heard it all the time in the U.S. at the time. I did hate the video for the song, though. Contrary to my opinion on the song, everything about the video is just awful, the worst aspect being how horrible Drake looks. Even the "We Found Love" video which I still hate is better than this video. But who cares about videos, anyway?

Also, I don't really get how this fit the "very forgetful as told to roll around in an Asian country" clue.

[josh]

WMN and OG(ITW) grew on me lately. I liked WMN, got sick of it, and now like it again. I'd probably put it top 20 (again, several singles that are just haha). I don't know, but I never really heard a bunch of the production on OG, but suddenly I hear it. And it's crazy good.

Side note: I think I'm gonna do Beyonce's singles.

[Lozzy]

Jun 28, 2012 23:43:40 GMT -5 josh said:

Side note: I think I'm gonna do Beyonce's singles.

More for us to disagree on!

[josh]

I'll probably wait for Gaga to finish because then I won't have 3 at once. Plus I still might change Gaga's order a little bit, and I only have a few more songs of Britney left before I need to put more in order lol. I put in order my least faves and my faves, but not the middle.

[Au$tin]

Jun 28, 2012 23:41:23 GMT -5 Lozzy said:

Also, I don't really get how this fit the "very forgetful as told to roll around in an Asian country" clue.

The "Coming up" section gives hints to the next tres songs. "What's My Name?" came from the "very forgetful" part. ;)

[josh]

Well you never said next THREE songs.!.!.!.

[Au$tin]

#38 - Roll It (with J-Status featuring Shontelle)[/size]


Next up is Rihanna's first ever collaboration single, "Roll It." This song is one of those songs that gets stuck inside your head when you don't want it there. It has one of the most annoying instrumentals out there, but God, that rhythm and that beat. Too infectious! Gah! Rihanna's bit is small, and isn't really a highlight, but it seems like her part is the most "normal" of the song. And listen to that voice! Aww! She sounds so young. Also on the track is Shontelle for some reason. She brings little to the song as well, yet she later recorded a solo version of it. Mmkay. This song has faded into obscurity for good reason. In fact, it seems like this song was only a hit in Finland. The song itself is an odd rebrand of "Roll It Gal" by Alison Hands, which is a female empowerment song, which is far from what this version ended up being. Why does it rank higher than "What's My Name?" and "Birthday Cake" for me? Because of its ridiculously catchy hook. Roll it, girl! Roll it, girl!

Coming up: Rihanna finds love in an Asian place while she lives her life.

[josh]

#37 Princess of China, #36 We Found Love, #35 Life Your Life

Also, I've never heard that before LOL

I'll listen in a minute once Good Time is done. Spamming that song like crazy LOL

[Lozzy]

I've never heard "Roll It" and don't care to listen to it. Surprised you even bothered including that flop.

I second Josh on "Princess Of China", "We Found Love" and "Live Your Life" being next, in that order.

[Agent Yoncé]

Jun 27, 2012 22:26:08 GMT -5 josh said:

I just assume everyone loves WFL at this point.

No. Ma'am.

Bring on the Rihahahanna list :)

[Au$tin]

Due to my lack of Internet connection at home, the countdown was postponed. It will continue tomorrow around noon CST.

[Au$tin]

#37 - Princess of China (with Coldplay)[/size]


Another collaboration single here. The Eastern inspired tune has its moments for me. Rihanna's part is ridiculously catchy, but Coldplay's verses just ruin it for me. It's an okay song, but I just can't get past those verses. It's really a shame because even though I don't like Coldplay, I was still expecting this song to be so good, but this just isn't. And what is up with that weird music video schedule? The song died months ago, and the video is just now released? Mmkay... Anyway, I know a lot of people do like this song, and I can see why. It has such a nice flowing rhythm, and like I said before, it's so catchy, but Coldplay's part is just too weird. I want to like it, but I just can't. Sorry, Coldplay.

Coming up: Rihanna finds "ozone" hiding out with a bunch of brightly lit stars.

[josh]

This song is fantastic. :'(

And way to be like 5 days late.

[Lozzy]

Not a fan of this one. I really wanted to love it, but it's just so messy and well, boring.

[Au$tin]

Since I really don't feel like writing up comments for the other 36...

4. Where Have You Been
5. Russian Roulette
6. If I Never See Your Face Again
7. Don't Stop the Music
8. You Da One
9. Talk That Talk
10. Shut Up and Drive
11. Cheers (Drink to That)
12. California King Bed
13. SOS
14. S&M
15. Who's That Chick?
16. Rude Boy
17. Hard
18. Unfaithful
19. Te Amo
20. Pon de Replay
21. Rehab
22. Take a Bow
23. Rockstar 101
24. Love the Way You Lie
25. Break It Off
26. We Ride
27. Raining Men
28. Man Down
29. If It's Lovin' That You Want
30. Run This Town
31. Take Care
32. Fly
33. Hate That I Love You
34. All of the Lights
35. Live Your Life
36. We Found Love

I'll give you the top 3 whenever I feel like it.

[Lozzy]

Eternal suspense > abandonment of formatting/commentary, tbh.

#4. Surprised it's so high. Good, but not worthy of top 10.
#5. I love it, but I wouldn't have it that high.
#6. I loved it in 2008 and I still enjoy it, but not top 10 worthy, definitely.
#7. Too low.
#8. Didn't expect that Top 10! It's good, but not worthy of top 10.
#9. It's great and shouldn't have done so poorly, but I don't think I'd place it that high.
#10. Not great, one of her worst successful singles (if you can call it successful).
#11. I liked it when it was out, it's fine now. I definitely wouldn't have it this high.
#12. Not great, only enjoyed it for a week or so.
#13. I enjoy it, but it's not as great as the world/radio/Pulse seems to think. The sample is nice.
#14. Great song! I'd probably rank it somewhere near #14 too.
#15. It's great, I really wish it had been a U.S. hit as well. One of Guetta's best ... but not Rihanna's.
#16. Always found this subpar. I can enjoy it at times, but it's ridiculously overrated.
#17. I like this one. I'd probably rank it somewhere near here.
#18. Much, much, much, much, much too low.
#19. Great song. I'm glad it was a hit here at least.
#20. Great debut! Not one of her best, but it's a good song and I'm glad it managed top 20.
#21. Always loved this one, wish it had done better.
#22. Really should be higher, it's one of her best.
#23. No. Just no. Well, actually, I did listen to it recently and it's not that awful, but still, much too high.
#24. I never really loved it, "Not Afraid" was always better to me. I'm fine with hearing it now, but I still don't love it.
#25. Fine. Nothing more than "fine", though. I'm surprised it was a hit.
#26. I don't even remember this one, but I don't think it's great.
#27. Probably the worst song in her singles discography.
#28. I like this one. The video was amazing.
#29. Nice song! I hate that Pulse seems to call it a flop. It's obviously not amongst her best, but I like it.
#30. Fantastic song, always loved it so much. Just everything about it was so amazing.
#31. I'm pretty sure you know how much I love this. 16 weeks at number one say it all.
#32. Meh, not that good. It's rather bland and goes nowhere, really.
#33. I really like this. I don't mind that it's rather forgotten now, but I'd definitely have it much higher than this.
#34. Really good, wish it had been a pop hit. The production was awesome.
#35. I wasn't a big fan when it was new, but I love it now. Possibly my favorite from T.I.'s flawless string of three hits.
#36. hahahahah glad it's this low. Though I probably wouldn't have it that low, it deserves it.

[josh]

lizard i disagree with you on most of these songs.

except probably wfl

[Lozzy]

No surprise there, but I wasn't expecting to disagree this much with Au$tin, actually.

[Agent Yoncé]

Hmmm. Please don't tell me Only Girl is #1

[Lozzy]

May I predict the top three?

01. "Only Girl (In The World)"
02. "Disturbia"
03. "Umbrella"

[Au$tin]

Jul 30, 2012 23:15:10 GMT -5 Lozzy said:

May I predict the top three?

01. "Only Girl (In The World)"
02. "Disturbia"
03. "Umbrella"

Well, those are the only three songs left. Are they in that order? I will eventually let y'all know.