Green Baron Hates All That Remains

[Green Baron]

I've been doing reviews since 2012, but I'm not going to link them all to you. Instead, I'll just update this with my latest one.

I'm an aspiring reviewer on Sputnikmusic, so if I can cross-promote, fine.

[Flip]

As long as you don't hate on good music :)

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 9:42:36 GMT -5 Flip said:

As long as you don't hate on good music :)

my next is Tove Lo, so...

[Mikey]

Oct 6, 2014 10:19:12 GMT -5 Green Baron said:

Oct 6, 2014 9:42:36 GMT -5 Flip said:

As long as you don't hate on good music :)

my next is Tove Lo, so...

Wew, that's harsh...

[Green Baron]

O.A.R. | The Rockville LP
55/100 

Much like All Sides and the album following it, King, The Rockville LP only goes to prove the ineffectiveness of O.A.R.’s poppier direction. There used to be a sense of flair and energy on songs like “Hey Girl” or even “Love and Memories”, but unsurprisingly, all of that remains nowhere to be seen here. The problem is not that O.A.R. went soft, but that the music is all so stale and uninteresting. The Rockville LP could be the playlist for any average Adult Contemporary radio station, and that’s been the band’s motto for the past half a decade. Yet despite its sameness, the album also tries to retread old territory. Following the release of 2012’s King, O.A.R. returned to their hometown of Rockville, Maryland for the first time in ten years, revisiting familiar places and faces with the sole purpose of rediscovering their roots, thus inspiring the title of the album. The only problem is, this so-called “return to roots” is really just nothing except a dash more of reggae and the new addition of some slight country influences, most likely due to the band writing them in Nashville. For the most part, The Rockville LP is a continuation of O.A.R.’s softer sound with some minor blasts from the past.


It’s not like the album is a complete failure – opener “Two Hands Up” fuses jam rock, reggae and some twangy guitars to create something that semi-resembles old O.A.R., even if it’s still got that polished sheen to it. Lead single “Peace” is an acoustic ballad that actually manages to be one of the more emotional songs that the band has written. “I just wanna make you laugh / I just wanna see that smile,” pleads frontman Marc Roberge as he desperately attempts to mend a broken relationship that is already broken beyond repair. Elsewhere, “The Architect” incorporates a ska-like brass section, with blaring horns that haven’t been seen on an O.A.R. song for years. As The Rockville LP continues, the songs become longer and more dragged out, culminating in the nine-minute long closer “I Will Find You”. The last four tracks all break four minutes, but the megalithic finale ranks as one of the band’s longest songs, just narrowly beating out “That Was a Crazy Game of Poker”. While “I Will Find You” isn’t as good (after all, topping “That Was a Crazy Game of Poker” is a pretty tough feat), it’s definitely one of the highlights on The Rockville LP. The dynamic track switches from slow to mid-tempo to fast suddenly, with no indication of a switchup happening. The first portion of the song is an emotional ballad, with saxophones blaring as Roberge repeatedly cries out the titular phrase over and over again. Four minutes in, the tempo increases slightly, but it’s the last change with three minutes remaining that speeds things up tenfold. Taking on a more country-like speed, “I Will Find You” draws The Rockville LP to a close with repeated live gang chants of “hey, just keep believing”. Because after all, isn’t that all we can do?

To read the rest of the review, click here.

[Green Baron]

Cody Devil Marlena Nylund American Idiot Doc Indie Party Rock

[Cody]

Just FYI it's cool if you wanna do this and all, but I won't be reading. I personally find reviews of music, movies, and tv shows to be useless. Everyone's taste is unique, no two people have identical likes, so to allow someone else's opinion of something to dictate whatever action I take regarding that piece of media would just be silly.

Besides, when I do read reviews (and I only do so AFTER having seen/heard the media for myself), I usually disagree with more of what's written than I agree with, even if I agree with the reviewer on the general black or white question of whether it was good or bad.

[Devil Marlena Nylund]

I'm kind of impressed at your writing, I won't lie. Whether I agree or not (I haven't heard the album), I expected you to focus on how much it wasn't alternative but you didn't. lol

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 17:32:32 GMT -5 Devil Marlena Nylund said:

I'm kind of impressed at your writing, I won't lie. Whether I agree or not (I haven't heard the album), I expected you to focus on how much it wasn't alternative but you didn't. lol

I'm trying to look professional, I can't pull that kind of crap.

but I'm easily the youngest reviewer there and everyone gives me shit for my personal life there so i told them all to lick my testicles and fucked off

i still review there, but i'm not an active user so

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 17:32:32 GMT -5 Devil Marlena Nylund said:

I'm kind of impressed at your writing, I won't lie. Whether I agree or not (I haven't heard the album), I expected you to focus on how much it wasn't alternative but you didn't. lol

Also everyone thinks my review of Anberlins cities is my best so just Google green baron anberlin cities sputnik and it's the 6th result

[Web]

Oct 6, 2014 17:11:19 GMT -5 Cody said:

Just FYI it's cool if you wanna do this and all, but I won't be reading. I personally find reviews of music, movies, and tv shows to be useless. Everyone's taste is unique, no two people have identical likes, so to allow someone else's opinion of something to dictate whatever action I take regarding that piece of media would just be silly.

I feel the same way, and try to avoid reviews before listening to albums because I don't want to go into the album trying to fit my expectations into that person's limited viewpoint (because as much as I don't want to, after reading anything I've already been influenced by their opinion in some way) . I like listening with an objective, blank slate. 

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 17:42:31 GMT -5 Web said:

Oct 6, 2014 17:11:19 GMT -5 Cody said:

Just FYI it's cool if you wanna do this and all, but I won't be reading. I personally find reviews of music, movies, and tv shows to be useless. Everyone's taste is unique, no two people have identical likes, so to allow someone else's opinion of something to dictate whatever action I take regarding that piece of media would just be silly.

I feel the same way, and try to avoid reviews before listening to albums because I don't want to go into the album trying to fit my expectations into that person's limited viewpoint (because as much as I don't want to, after reading anything I've already been influenced by their opinion in some way) . I like listening with an objective, blank slate. 

I'm the exact opposite

[Devil Marlena Nylund]

I'm not. I try as much as I can to form my own opinion and since I write reviews on most new albums I buy/listen to, I will take notes the first few times I listen until I'm pretty certain I know how I feel about the album and what my general rating is going to be. Sometimes I'm not sure why I feel the way I do about an album and then I'll read reviews to see if they explain it for me, but otherwise, I try to avoid reviews until afterward. It's the same way with movies. Usually all I know about an album beforehand is if it's getting really good or really bad reviews. I even avoid album threads here on Pulse until I've formed an opinion.

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 19:49:19 GMT -5 Devil Marlena Nylund said:

I'm not. I try as much as I can to form my own opinion and since I write reviews on most new albums I buy/listen to, I will take notes the first few times I listen until I'm pretty certain I know how I feel about the album and what my general rating is going to be. Sometimes I'm not sure why I feel the way I do about an album and then I'll read reviews to see if they explain it for me, but otherwise, I try to avoid reviews until afterward. It's the same way with movies. Usually all I know about an album beforehand is if it's getting really good or really bad reviews. I even avoid album threads here on Pulse until I've formed an opinion.

but my anberlin review was based all on heart and soul

not on the opinions of others

[Green Baron]

no Devil Marlena Nylund seriously like it all you want but there's no way stuff like

"As a romantically inexperienced teenager, Cities changed my perceptions of love and heartbreak. In Christian’s eyes, love is futilely inquiring “Is anybody out there?” and falsely proclaiming that “things are change now for the better”. Forget moving on – why move on when the images can scar you mind and her words can be the noose for your hanging? If I had known the rejection would have been so severe, I never would have bothered asking her anyway. Months of hope and nervousness crushed by a word – the word that drove me to give up trying. Even though I swore never to fall in love again, what if I can’t help it?"

was stolen from Steve McHalperin.

[maine]

I've always liked your reviews on Sputnik, even before I was on Pulse (or knew you were on Sputnik when I did join here ). Your review for O.A.R. is pretty spot on (or at least with my opinion of the album). It kinda surprises me how well of a writer you are lol.

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 21:19:07 GMT -5 maine said:

I've always liked your reviews on Sputnik, even before I was on Pulse (or knew you were on Sputnik when I did join here ). Your review for O.A.R. is pretty spot on (or at least with my opinion of the album). It kinda surprises me how well of a writer you are lol.

everyone's always so shocked how young i am, then they read my rants on life and they're like oh nvm i ain't surprised

which reviews of mine have you liked the most before you knew I was on Pulse?

[maine]

Oct 6, 2014 21:22:33 GMT -5 Green Baron said:

Oct 6, 2014 21:19:07 GMT -5 maine said:

I've always liked your reviews on Sputnik, even before I was on Pulse (or knew you were on Sputnik when I did join here ). Your review for O.A.R. is pretty spot on (or at least with my opinion of the album). It kinda surprises me how well of a writer you are lol.

everyone's always so shocked how young i am, then they read my rants on life and they're like oh nvm i ain't surprised

which reviews of mine have you liked the most before you knew I was on Pulse?

To be honest I don't know lol. I've pos'd quite a few. I think it might have been your Mind Over Matter, Fading West, and American Authors EP (all from the same month lol) that I pos'd. I remember recognizing your name when I was on the Alt board, and then I connected the dots. 

[Green Baron]

Oct 6, 2014 21:26:59 GMT -5 maine said:

Oct 6, 2014 21:22:33 GMT -5 Green Baron said:

everyone's always so shocked how young i am, then they read my rants on life and they're like oh nvm i ain't surprised

which reviews of mine have you liked the most before you knew I was on Pulse?

To be honest I don't know lol. I've pos'd quite a few. I think it might have been your Mind Over Matter, Fading West, and American Authors EP (all from the same month lol) that I pos'd. I remember recognizing your name when I was on the Alt board, and then I connected the dots. 

did you know a user named greenlinkinmuse?

[maine]

Oct 6, 2014 21:29:01 GMT -5 Green Baron said:

Oct 6, 2014 21:26:59 GMT -5 maine said:

To be honest I don't know lol. I've pos'd quite a few. I think it might have been your Mind Over Matter, Fading West, and American Authors EP (all from the same month lol) that I pos'd. I remember recognizing your name when I was on the Alt board, and then I connected the dots. 

did you know a user named greenlinkinmuse?

Not from what I can remember.

[Green Baron]

Tove Lo | Queen of the Clouds
TBA/100

Queen of the Clouds suffers from some underlying flaws, the biggest of which being how damn inconsistent it is. There are too many songs that re completely devoid of any good and do nothing but take up album space. For every “Talking Body” or “This Time Around”, there are tracks like “Got Love” or “Habits (Stay High)” that are nothing special and don’t offer any memorable moments; in the case of the latter, its annoying “oh-oh”s and way-too descriptive lyrics about sex clubs and Twinkie-binging work against its favor. Even worse are songs that actually contain potential but are completely ruined by a few poor songwriting decisions. “Timebomb” has a chorus that’s not all that bad, but the rest of the song is way too wordy that it’s actually pretty hilarious to listen to it, although sifting through the rubble just to hear the hook isn’t worth it. Elsewhere, “The Way That I Am” wastes an opportunity to be a powerful ballad by its overindulgence in dubstep that completely strips away any pretense of emotion, since Tove Lo’s rising vocals are drowned in the layers of fat low-end and kick-snare synths.

Read the rest of the review when the contest is over.

[Green Baron]

maine Lahey's Lucky Star surfy Cody (I know, I'm sorry, but just hear me out for this one time), Lordef†ones, Zeebz Fancy @jf816 Flip @rasengan

Here's what I want you guys to do.

Read the excerpt I put up there.
Guess the album score
You have 24 hours
Winner gets something

[maine]

56/one hunda

Good review though. One thing I gotta ask, did you view of "Not On Drugs" change? I remember in the QOTC thread you said that's where the album got sh*tty, but in your full review, you praised it. Just curious lol. And full thoughts on "Thousand Miles" (lol favorite one for me)? 

ETA: Sh*t, I read the review before you posted about the contest lol. I gave it an expanded rating though.

[Lordef†ones]

Wow how dare you bash Tove Lo wtf is this.

I usually don't pay attention to reviews unless it's an album I listen to, cause then I compare my thoughts with critics' (I also like it when albums I love get widespread acclaim) I do tend to favor AllMusic though.

Also I prefer track-by-track reviews, though not enough people do them unfortunately.

If I were to guess your score though, I'd guess 70, which is really undeserving cause I love to love Tove Lo.

[Green Baron]

Oct 7, 2014 21:36:13 GMT -5 Lordef†ones said:

If I were to guess your score though, I'd guess 70, which is really undeserving cause I love to love Tove Lo.

I just gave her so much shit and you guess 70?????

[Lordef†ones]

Oct 7, 2014 21:38:41 GMT -5 Green Baron said:

Oct 7, 2014 21:36:13 GMT -5 Lordef†ones said:

If I were to guess your score though, I'd guess 70, which is really undeserving cause I love to love Tove Lo.

I just gave her so much s**t and you guess 70?????

I have to AT LEAST hope you let your integrity win you over your Habit hate, because it's truly a good album.

[surfy]

I don't agree with the review, but I will guess a 40.

[Fancy]

45

[josh]

0

"Beyond all else, perhaps, think of this zero as the massive bedazzled orifice out of which our heroine has spawned a new era of popular culture."

[Zeebz]

55, given that you like some of it.