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Post by Love Plastic Love on May 8, 2010 21:55:23 GMT -5
She is supposedly completing recording soon and will release by the end of the year.
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Post by kt1990 on May 9, 2010 14:01:17 GMT -5
Finally she blogged! She IS alive! Being mauled by that dog must have been nasty. I feel for the girl.
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George
Diamond Member
Joined: November 2005
Posts: 21,486
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Post by George on Jun 24, 2010 21:57:36 GMT -5
Jun 21 2010 12:58 PM ET Singer Vanessa Carlton reveals she's 'a proud bisexual woman'
by Tim Stack Singer Vanessa Carlton, best known for her hits “A Thousand Miles” and “Ordinary Day,” came out as bisexual during a performance on stage at Nashville Pride over the weekend. Before launching into her song “Who’s to Say,” Carlton announced, “I’ve never said this before but, while we’re here and living out loud as we should every single day, I, myself, am a proud bisexual woman.” Full video below…
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Ace
5x Platinum Member
The Guvanah
I enjoy walkin Soho drinkin in the afternoon
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 5,218
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Post by Ace on Jun 29, 2010 16:07:36 GMT -5
Hands on Me was probably the best song she's ever recorded...if it had launched the album, it would have been a hit.
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Post by kt1990 on Jun 29, 2010 16:36:17 GMT -5
Hands on Me was probably the best song she's ever recorded...if it had launched the album, it would have been a hit. Agreed. I'll never, ever, understand how it didn't smash. :Shakingandcrying:
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Post by Nic (Britney Spears) on Jul 2, 2010 9:18:08 GMT -5
An analysis of Vanessa Carlton's song "1000 miles"
"If I could fall into the sky, Do you think time would pass me by? 'Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles If I could just see you... Tonight."
Now, leaving aside Miss Carlton's frankly woeful grasp of the basic concepts of specal relativity and time dilation, I frankly must flag up her ludicrous claim that she would walk "a thousand miles" in order to see "you" (one would assume this is a boyfriend, or lover) tonight. Essentially, in this stanza the songstress is making the claim that she would walk 1,000 miles in a day, no small claim!
Let's analyse this a bit further. In order to walk 1,000 miles in 24 hours the leggy beauty would be required to ambulate at an average speed of 41.6mph, or 18.6 meters per second. Now, remember the claim that this distance would be walked. The USATF (United States track and field association) defines walking as "a progression of steps so taken that the walker makes contact with the ground so that no visible (to the human eye) loss of contact occurs". This means that one of miss carlton's perfectly manicured feet must be in contact with the ground at all times during this ludicrous endurance event.
Since it is obvious that no average human walker could accomplish such a feat, it is clear that we somehow need to modify the singer’s gait somehow. Clearly, we need either to lengthen her stride or decrease the time taken between each step. I will now deal with each of these in turn.
To begin with, let us look at lengthening each stride that her sumptuous legs take. The obvious solution to this is to use stilts, to increase the length of each step that she takes. Since it is reasonable to assume that she will take roughly 1 step per second, it appears that currently single Carlton’s stride will need to be increased to around 19 meters in length. Assuming her legs make an angle of 30 degrees with each stride, her total leg length would need to be increased to around 20 meters, which would require stilts of 19 meters in length. Now, while the thought of the willowy singer-songwriter perched atop 19 meter long pieces of bamboo or metal may seem a little far fetched, I would remind you that Vanessa once ran, and completed, the New York marathon, so I can only conclude that she would be up for the physical challenges of a 1000 mile long stilt walk. However, there would me many hurdles, both metaphorical and physical, for miss Carlton to cross before her arduous trek was completed. For starters, she would need to master the art of stiltwalking on what would surely be world-record high stilts, which would be no easy task. The stilts would also have to be constructed from some state-of-the-art material, such as carbon nanotubes or ‘solid air’ in order that they be light enough not to tire her perfectly shaped legs, but durable enough to travel several hundred leagues. The R&D costs for such materials are unlikely to be cheap. Walking 1,000 miles on 20 meter high stilts will also prevent more obvious problems. Should miss Carlton encounter any electricity pylons on her journey, which is highly likely, she would have a great deal of difficulty passing by without suffering a massive electric shock. She would also have difficulty seeing the ground, making for arduous footing. Should she need to take nourishment on the journey, she would also have difficulty reaching down in order to grab an offered bottle of squash or crunchie bar, or to sign an autograph for one of her legion of fans. Instead, she would need to carry an elongated ‘grabbing arm’ with her, which would only add to the weight she would be forced to carry. Since no stoppages have been factored into this journey, it is likely that the pop-tart, who was recently dropped from her record label, would be forced to wear some kind of nappy in order that she avoid showering poor innocents below with her urine and faeces. All in all, it seems that a stiltwalk of this magnitude would be a daunting and unpleasant task.
Since it seems that increasing the length of the classically trained ballet-dancers stride would be a difficult task, let us investigate whether it would be possible for us to instead increase the number of steps that she takes per unit time. The average female stride is about 2.2 feet, or around .7 meters long. While I do not doubt that she is an extraordinary woman in many ways, when it comes to length of stride I will assume that Vanessa Carlton is just like any other woman! In order for her to achieve a speed of 18.6 meters per second, she would need to take 26.5 strides per second, or one stride every 0.03 seconds! That’s more fasters than a hummingbird’s wings move. While this may sound impossible, where there’s a will there’s a way, and I have no doubt that Vanessa Carlton is a strong willed lady. One way to perhaps achieve such a ludicrous step-rate would be to attach a miniature jet engine to the back of each of Vanessa’s knees, these could be programmed to quickly fire every 0.06 of a second, allowing her to ‘jet-knee’ at speeds of up to 40mph, and easily accomplish her journey to meet her one true love. However, there would again be considerable difficulty attached to the task. For starters, it would necessitate the design and construction of two miniature jet engines, capable of firing on an extremely short timescale reliably for periods of 24 hours. The R&D costs alone would come to billions, and while Miss Carlton is certainly a moderately successful popular musician, the lacklustre sales of her recent album ‘Heroes and Thieves’ suggests she might not be able to bankroll such a massive industrial project. There is also the effect on her body to consider. While I have no doubt that Miss Carlton consumes her recommended amount of calcium, it is unlikely that even her healthy bone structure could withstand the stresses placed upon it by rapidly jet-kneeing across the countryside. It is clear that she would have to have her bones re-enforced with adamantium, like wolverine out of the x-men. Unfortunately adamantium is a fictional alloy, meaning that it’s supply is therefore limited and expensive. Having a jet engine firing in close proximity to one’s skin is also likely to produce mild burning, and would quickly reduce miss Carlton’s knee cartilage to a charred mess. So some kind of protective garment, perhaps a layer of straw, would be in order. During the course of her marathon jet-knee, it is also clear that Miss Carlton would need to carry fuel to power the miniature engines on her 2million step-plus journey. This would clearly be an significant extra weight burden, and would need to be factored into all the relevant calculations.
It seems that whichever mode of transport she chooses, be it giant stilts or jet-kneeing, the lusty beauty is in for a tough ride. One must simply ask the question why she couldn’t have caught a train, or a cheap flight to meet her lover. Instead, she has set herself a bizarre and highly difficult endurance task, which she feels she must accomplish before seeing him. This would take months to prepare for, and would be very unlikely to be completed to the satisfaction of the independent adjudicators from the international competitive walking federation. For one, it is highly unlikely that they would sanction an event involving either stilts or jet-knees, and just one trip on a stilt or mis-fire of a jet engine could see the event end in tatters. In the unlikely event that she were to finish on time, she would certainly not be in any state to greet her lover. She would be exhausted, blistered, sweaty and covered in insects that had splattered against her. Hardly likely to be an appetising prospect for her boyfriend. She would also take days, or even weeks, to recover, which would only serve to increase the time they spent apart. Personally, I think that it seems the relationship is dead in the water, and they should both just be honest with one another and end it before any more feelings get hurt.
At the very least, I think that Vanessa should follow the advice of Scotch pop-rock group The Proclaimers, and “walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more”. I’m sure that a break in the middle would make the whole thing much easier.
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Post by kt1990 on Jul 2, 2010 10:06:15 GMT -5
^ . I don't even know how to respond to that.
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David
Diamond Member
Joined: January 2009
Posts: 16,804
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Post by David on Jul 2, 2010 13:10:47 GMT -5
Hands on Me was probably the best song she's ever recorded...if it had launched the album, it would have been a hit. I LOVE Hands On Me! I preferred Heroes & Thieves though. I think my favorite Vanessa track is still White Houses. <3
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Gravity.
7x Platinum Member
Mischief Managed
Truth.
Joined: February 2009
Posts: 7,962
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Post by Gravity. on Jul 2, 2010 21:17:52 GMT -5
White Houses is my favorite Vanessa song.
"We were all in love and we all got hurt." So simple, but effective.
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face
New Member
Joined: February 2009
Posts: 191
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Post by face on Jul 2, 2010 21:39:11 GMT -5
Harmonium in general was an amazing, underrated album. <3 Heroes and Thieves is pretty good, too.
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Continuum
New Member
Joined: February 2010
Posts: 409
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Post by Continuum on Jul 4, 2010 2:42:10 GMT -5
i really wish she could be famous....
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